Have you ever thought about the impression you make on another person?
What about that another is just an other (just kidding).
Of course you have (to the former). We all, at some age, realize self consciousness. It’s a gift and a curse, depending on whether you’re guided through it or not, whether you’ve been conditioned to go into the world averting that which may oppose you, or ascend it.
Either way, we make impressions on people and much of the time we do not go into situations setting our intentions to make a particular impression.
Some people do in that they think, “Oh, I want her to like me,” or “I’ll make them see the value of me and my idea,” or “I’ll convince them to side with me”.
This isn’t really impressing, it’s an attempt at convincing.
Think of what an impression really is, it’s an imprint.
You cannot convince the sand to act differently towards your foot. The sand receives you just as you are, it interprets you. We can change some things, the part of the foot we put our weight on, the kind of sand we walk in (wet or dry), the speed in which we move across the sand, or even wearing shoes makes a difference in the imprint. Just the same, there are certain things we cannot change. Our weight is our weight. The size and distinct character of our foot is unchangeable.
Likewise, who we are is unchangeable, absolute. We often wear masks and fly flags to persuade people to believe certain things, but humans, just like the sand, are intuitive and more often than not people respond to us based on the feeling of another, not just what we logically perceive.
You can put on your best smile and most jovial laugh but if you’re falling apart on the inside your interactions with people with reflect that.
So how to intentionally impress?
Know yourself. Learning what’s absolutely important and invaluable to you is what makes you who you are. We are not all the same human, we each have a role and responsibility to discover that which drives us. And then we are able to impress people with the importance of that knowledge, the beauty of it, the life in it.
We leave an imprint in people every time we interact with them. It doesn’t always have to be significant, but there are times when we know we need to impress someone. It’s then that being you’re absolute genuine self is the most important thing, the one thing. Because it’s then that you make a lasting impression. When you focus on what it is that makes you tick, you are living in joy. To enjoy what you are expressing will create a joyful experience in others. That’s what people remember.
“Who was that girl talking about _____?”
“Remember that guy who kept laughing and kept bringing everything back to ______?”
The world needs people with specialties, it needs people to be proficient in one thing and improve the current state of readiness to take action. We all have potential to be masters of something. It takes 10,000 hours (Malcolm Gladwell’s research: http://www.wisdomgroup.com/blog/10000-hours-of-practice/) to master a skill but only by identifying what it is that you are inherently competent at that you can take the first step of the journey of mastery. Side note, I do not believe it takes 10,000 hours to master a skill, and especially not to become merely skillful.
When we decide we will be our most genuine selves and know who we are is when we make the most lasting impressions, the most beneficial relationships. It’s only when you are expressing your colors, the ones of your heart and mind connected, that we attract those who need us most. We each have an audience, perhaps of 2 or 10 or 10,000, that needs to know that which we were born with the unfilled potential to share. Knowledge isn’t power, it’s potential for power.
Imagine, you walk into a room. It’s an important day. You know there are people you will meet that may or may affect your business, passion, or life situation dramatically. You know there are potential lifelong relationship connections to be made today. With whom do you want to make connections?
Is it just with those who are most powerful, influential, or successful? Do you want to swoon the rich so that you might have an easy in? Do you want to persuade a CEO that you belong in their group, so that you’ll have that high paying job? Do you want to meet someone so that you can have a love relationship?
These are options that people choose every day. I call them the middle road. The low road is not choosing at all but allowing yourself to be pulled and pushed into a place without ever investigating what really matters to you.
Then there’s the high road. It exists for the few who wish to ascend that which challenges them or tells them they can’t. How many times have you heard that something would be too hard, or is unbelievable, not doable, unattainable? It doesn’t just take courage to ascend, it takes knowing that which is most important to you. It’s this innate knowing that allows us to press on when we seem to have hit a dead end because we have cultivated a healthy thirst and belief of that which gives us the desire to live.
Did Westley give up on reaching Buttercup, even though he was challenged practically the entire time he was pursuing her captors?
The high road is knowing. It’s believing that you always have something to offer, that you have great potential to aid the world in a particular way that it needs. The high road is walking into a room with an interior smile because you’re going to express your truth in every exchange, be genuine the whole day, and be attracted to those who will be benefited by you and who also can help you. The day will whirl by, filled with truly exciting exchanges because you are living your destiny. What could be more important? You deserve this kind of day, you belong in the exchanges that make you laugh and feel excited while relaxed (that attainable FLOW state), and most of all it’s your responsibility to have this. Because the world needs everyone to radiate brilliance and as of now only a small percentage are doing so. We owe it to life to give it our best because in the blink of an eye we’ll be living our last day and wondering, “did I live as well as I knew I was capable of?”
There are two risks in interactions, speaking your truth and listening. The high road is distinguishing the time for each.
There are dozens of hacks to assist us in our energy, intellectual focus, mental integrity, resilience, and spiritual growth. But until we know what it is we wish to master, to teach, we can not begin improving our methods of doing so.
Stay impressionable, keep impressing, and “Have fun stormin’ da castle.”